Confessions of a drinker student abroad

Monday, February 21, 2011


Well, that was a shit weekend. Apologies for language, but nothing else really expresses how upsetting it was. Yay, let's spend Friday and Saturday inside watching movies and resting because on Sunday we have a huge match, it will finally be my chance to prove to myself that all of my hard work hasn't been for nothing. Oh, wait...turns out it was just two days and nights of staying in so that on Sunday I could learn a new life lesson. Sadly, that life lesson was not, "even if you do your best sometimes the other team is just better". Instead the lesson I learned was, "No matter how much time and money and work you put into something, it doesn't really matter, because when the chips are down, someone in a position of authority over you is going to slag you off in favor of someone less qualified and less dedicated for no apparent reason." This of course leads to plenty of time on the sideline to question your ability, and since you obviously don't see what's wrong, maybe there are things wrong in other places where you think you're doing okay.

Football used to be what kept me going, it provided comraderie, self confidence, and helped me believe that if I just worked hard enough I could make a difference, whether it was on the pitch, or in my profession. Instead, it's shattered all of that. So, summation of the weekend: everything is pointless, cause it doesn't really matter how hard you try, you won't be given the chance to make a difference, so now all that's left to do is wait for Wednesday with hopes high that I've failed at least 1 class so I can leave this hellhole.

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